Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Saying goodbye to Kota
I was taking Kota out for his nightly walk tonight when I noticed something red on his lame leg, I brought him into the house and noticed that there was a big bloody mass protruding from his knee and that most likely it is his tumor. I immediately started to cry knowing that this really was it, that no matter how else he might be feeling the cancer has taken over and its time to say goodbye. I can clean it up with all my nursing prowess and keep nice saline wet to dry dressings on his mass but in the end it is cancer and its only going to get worse. Right now he isn't suffering, he is eating and playing and still smiling, its time. I will let his day be his normal day with his friends tomorrow morning but I will spend quality time with him until we bring him in tomorrow night. I don't know how I am going to be but right now I feel such an emptiness in my heart and only wish I could have more time with him.
To my amazing dog Kota, you have given us 10+ years of love and joy, chewed up decks, dug up holes, missing underwear and socks all to come out in your poop the next day, you have suffered through the bloat, a splenectomy, ACL repair and urinary incontinence but you have given us all of your love and I will never, ever forget you. You were my first child that I had to take care of, my first real responsibility, you taught me how to love and to care, thank you.
We love you Kota.